i've got nowhere to go ...... i dont know what i should probably do now, my life is confusing . my dad. always try his ass off to take control of everything . i feel so numb right now, i don't think im gonna be okay . maybe i'll break down soon enough . i'm on the egde of breaking down now .
its just everything is different now. its not a problem that daddy is trying to take control ... but hello? he made this situation ....... he made this. there's no way i can be okay . i know he love me that he wants the best for me . its not that i don't love him or sumthing its just .... i don't like him all the time . and my life? its been such a long time that he's not around ...... that make me sometimes quite upset why did my mom have to call him everytime we fight too far . i believe we can finished it our self . bcs i don't like how my dad solve problems sometimes . it makes me miserable . in almost every conclusion he ever made .
like this one . okay maybe this is isnt exactly jail . but it felt like my dad put me in a .. well what can i called it . far-away-comfty-kins-house . away from my mom . my mom!!! :'(
SO i've quote a view songs i listen here .
that draws me with the lyrics .
simple plan - Perfect (WHOLE DAMN SONG)
" i'm tired of being what you want me to be, feeling so faithless, lost under the surface, i don't know what you're expecting of me . every step that i take is another mistake to you. i've become so numb i can't feel you there . become so tired. can't you see that you smothering me? holding too tightly, afraid to lose control" LINKIN PARK- Numb
i really did feel so numb right now . like i don't know what to feel . its like even when i know. its wrong . like all i gotta do is hold my feelings in . thats every possible thing that i could feel is simply just wrong .
its hurts . but i just gotta live with it . even though figuring out how is hard....
